IT Guy

So my name is Danny and you know a lot of people they call me Dannyboy you know and then there's always those people that want to change it and call me Daniel. but no it's Danny, says it on my birth certificate.

Danny. it is what it is.

So I'm a computer guy yeah you know I'm a goofball, I love telling jokes. Doesnt mean im always good at it but i do love to do it. Its not what pays the bills though. Nope. At night i gotta shake my moneymaker. This is america bitches, ima do what i gotta!

but if I if it was up to comedy? Id be fucking broke.

I spend more on alcohol than they pay me. so I'm a computer guy. I prefer IT person. Dont laugh! Wait, yeah laugh! Forgot why i was here for a minute. It is so not fucking glorious being an IT guy. People call you for the shittiest stuff! And you're suppose to always make it sound like what theyre asking you for isnt fucking stupid!

That's fucking stupid Sonya! Why the fuck do you want to do that! Nope, i gotta be like. Hi Sonya, i hope everything is dandy with you, how may i be of assistance to you? I'm sorry Sonya, no i totally see why you need to print at home from the office. Matter of fact i should be able to print to your house from the office too!

it's not a glamorous job no, realtor or broker thats glamorous. computer guy not so glamorous

Try to pick up a girl at a bar and tell her you're an IT guy. yeah, try and start talking about gigabytes and protocols. oh my gosh thats exciting, oh my gosh.

Did you just tell me that the transmission speed of USB three is faster than gigabit. I don't know what that means but he he he.

She's on her phone at DeVry.com to see how much I make.

this guy he barely makes a hundred thousand dollars a year how is he supposed to pay. how's he supposed to pay for my boots, boobs, booze, and my Bentley.

Just like my boy Joel said in Good Charlotte, women don't care about men, women care about cars and money.

Give a woman a car and some cash, you get whatever you want. But don't expect to get anymore until she does. ha ha, it dries up better be prepared to be replaced. that's why I spend my time in my lab with computers. It's easier to be alone with a frustrating computer than it is satisfying a woman.